pricklylegs:

sparkleholethess:

yeahiwasintheshit:

its not. really its just not going to happen

I’m afraid when the inventor says it’s JIF, it’s JIF.

Well my accent clearly makes it sound like Gif.. that`s my story and I`m sticking to it.

swiftingthrough:

oh my god

googlehomie:

you’re gonna regret not dating me after I get hot

laye-z:

oh yeah baby come to mumma

highmiranda:

ME TO EVERY BOY WHOS EVER BEEN RUDE TO ME

jimbertimber:

coming out to your parents by saying swiggity swag guess whos a fag

snowwanderer:

chrissykilljoybitchtits:

inc-omparable:

im-fandoomed:

hitlervevo:

why the fuck cant we text the police

lets say there is a murderer in ur house and you’re hiding behind your sofa and you do have your phone with you but you can’t call the police because the murderer might hear you

Here in Canada you can

Here in England we just… scream and run

Here in Scotland we paint our faces and run towards the murderer

Here in Australia we offer them beer

8yearoldslut:

me arriving at the gates of hell

gamsee:

how do you start a conversation with someone without sounding lame do you just be like Hey man how many cool scooter tricks can u do

Politeness has become so rare that some people mistake it for flirtation.

pieandangels:

sextgod:

I sext via prayer

death-by-lulz:

besachan:

His face though
It’s my bedroom face to Joshua

itsthestrangestlifeiveeverknown:

 

my-little-butter-cup:

OH GOD IM LIKE CRYING.